Dating?

One other moment from the first episode of “Master of None” caught my attention. In the very first scene, Dev—the main character—is having sex with a woman when his condom breaks. Concerned that she might get pregnant, he calls an Uber (UberX, not Uber BLACK), and they go to a pharmacy to pick up a birth control pill. The Uber drops the woman off at her apartment. Dev and the woman end the night by saying, “Well, it was nice meeting you. Let’s keep in touch.”

I imagine that this is a perfectly ordinary scene, one that many of my peers have experienced. What struck me was the casual nature of the encounter. As Dev himself said, in describing how the Plan B pill helped him avoid a potential crisis, “So now two people that barely know each other won’t be raising a human child together.”

I suppose this is part of what is called the hook-up culture? I really don’t know. I’ve only gone on one date in my life, and that was back in 2011. There’s a lot about dating and romance in the modern age that I don’t understand. I had heard about people hooking up, but it was interesting to see an example play out on screen.

I don’t mean any judgment or condemnation in my words. People will do what they will. I just note how I approach relationships differently. For my own part, I was raised was to approach relationship with care and consideration. I want to treat relationships delicately, because they are powerful. In thinking about the woman I want to date, I want to make sure to treat her with respect, honor, and kindness. This is not to say that a casual hook-up can’t provide these attributes, but it doesn’t seem particularly conducive to do so.

Some of this approach stems from my Korean upbringing. Some of it stems from my faith tradition—I have been extolled to “Treat your potential date as the daughter of the King.” But also, I believe that a relationship will not be the complete answer for my insecurity and loneliness. A romantic relationship is important, of course, but I can’t rely on it to provide me with total fulfillment. That is too much burden to cast on one person.

Anyway, the show is fun and I’ll probably watch another episode. Maybe I’ll learn more interesting things about my generation!

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